EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED. LIFE keeps unfolding its never-ending uncertainty. Life is savage in its way, it doesn’t concern about your approvals and still makes you choose. You have to choose something at all points. There is no extreme balanced way. Why be handling and balancing things all the time? Sometimes resting your soul is all needed! Something in favour of someone will always be against someone else. You can’t do all good for everyone at once. You can’t keep everyone happy. Why always take references of some mature, complex learnings and guidance? Sometimes all we need is a simple yes /no. Simple okay/ not okay. Why do you need always to listen to cover songs of a particular track, sometimes just an instrumental cover is all that our ears and heart need? Without words, without who is pronouncing it with what emotion. Let Music alone decide the pace.

Today I feel lost and failed. An Author can’t always be wise and balanced! They can be anything from emotional to practical, opinionated, vague, understating, exaggerative, Clear, confused, gloomy, angry, or lost at times. Sometimes they feel the need to be free from all the judgments, all the likes and dislikes. They just want to write their heart out. Sometimes you can know and understand everything still can be unaware. Sometimes you can be the wisest one, still confused by your own thoughts!

Sometimes you need to get destroyed bit by bit to recreate something unique and beautiful. Currently, my mind is running with hundreds of WHY? It’s okay if sometimes you feel hopeless; yeah! it’s okay because you can’t control this feeling at that moment when it’s the only feeling you have. Let’s just feel it and let it pass. Don’t run away from your instincts, your feelings, your emotions, because they can run faster than you. It will chase and hunt you down. Let things scare you, let your work tire you, let the worldly matters exhaust your soul; only then you will sit in one place and stop running. The more you run the more things will tire you. You stop running, face it and if you can’t stand strong then just sit there down. But stop running.

Why keep avoiding the suffering? Why always seek comfort, why always be worried? Most of the time all we need to do is LET GO. letting go comes with openness to whatever comes your way. people suffer from either memories or the future. People get worried when someone goes blank, or freezes. In my understanding, this is the moment of peace in the true sense because this is the space (gap) where there is no imagination or memory present. Where nothing exists. No Chaos! Everyone has told us -in life it’s about how we react to a particular situation rather than what it is! But nobody tells us that sometimes it is actually about what it is in real and not just about how we look at it. (For example- If you kill someone and do not react guilty, or bad about it, does that act becomes right? Just because you are not reacting about it! It still stands wrong and extremely wrong. There is always another side to every saying, every learning, every story just as to every moon and every coin.

The question is what all of us are running away from? Suffering? Suffering cannot be avoided. If you continuously try to find ways to avoid suffering, you will be suffering from the tiredness of the need to avoid suffering all the time. Then why not suffer for a while and then move forward? Why just try to escape and run all the time? why always feel scared and hiding? Although you can choose to suffer over another thing- like by working on yourself, by maintaining discipline. It is also a kind of suffering, which eventually gives you amazing results but for your work-in-progress, it’s a kind of suffering.  Attachments have the power to fuck you to the core. Once you are attached, you are fucked! When you get attached to a person’s presence you will suffer from their absence, when you get attached to someone’s goodness, you will suffer from their mild bad behaviour, when you get used to being a priority in someone’s life; you will suffer when even for a single time if they fail to make you feel the same way about it.

There’s always good in everything only if you want to see it, so in the suffering!! Suffering is never bad, it evolves, moves recreate! A reset button to our ruined lives and an absolute liberation!!  If it’s killing you to let it go, still let it go because anyways holding onto it has already been killing you for a long time! So, there’s nothing to be scared of, try another method. Let it go and you will live!!!

You don’t always know what you do, where you flow, what’s right, you don’t always have control!! Let it be, let yourself be destroyed bit by bit- let something beautiful be created out of those ashes. Being wrong is okay, staying wrong is not. Correct your mistakes as soon as you realize them. Be kind to yourself, why always go with the flow? why not take a little pain to give the flow a direction? Why not give your rhythm to the flow? There’s not always a place where you can run to, there’s not always a comfortable space where you can recreate. Recreation always breaks out of discomfort!

I do feel scared, I do feel being the wrong one, I do feel being the lost soul! Processing things more, feeling emotions deeply every time can be a curse too! But it is what it is! As they say “You never lose your demons, you just learn to live above them.” There are always people around you, who silently want you to pay for the things which you have done and for the things which you have not done as well. There are people around you, who silently hate you for who you are. People will leave you, things will leave you at the times when you need them the most! Life can do the worst to you, you have to stay Alive! Self-pity and all don’t work. I was watching the movie Mitthu yesterday, where the writer writes “If you want to stay with fire you can’t be the water, you need to be that iron who can mould and gel and be anything that is required. “

ALL THAT WE ARE IS THE RESULT OF WHAT WE HAVE THOUGHT – BUDDHA

The ending is the new beginning!!

PS: Grateful for the kind souls around- ( Flash & Bablu )